Introduction – What is the Dual-self?
The idea that I present in this emerging book is really a very simple idea. It came to me in my quest to live satisfying and fulfilling life though having full control of my actions but more importantly the outcomes of those actions. Most people always have some degree of control over our actions, but when it comes to the outcomes or results this is not always the case! The older, mature and wiser I got, I observed that, regardless of whether I consciously changed my behavior choices, action patterns, or even characters, the Results would always be the same! Be it a positive or negative outcome, this creates all the self incriminating adjectives that hinder us to realize a completely fulfilling life. It could be fear, self-doubt, self-criticism, insecurity – you name it, you probably have had it.
In my quest to live a more satisfying and fulfilling life, I sort to overcome habits that hindered my progress towards a fulfilling successful career, relationships, business, but in stead lead to pain, loneliness and sorrow in my life, even though I am an intelligent, well educated, well balanced, financially secure woman. What then was the problem? As I pondered over the everyday mishaps of life, I realized that sometimes I seemed to have it together and at other times my life was in a constant state of confusion. Even though my behavior had been based on a logical and rational reasoning, the consequences or results of my actions took me to a place I had not anticipated, and usually places I did not want to be. I attributed it to PMS blues, as most of us women do, Stress, Medication and a menu of other reasons that really did not add up. For example I experience PMS every month yet sometimes during that time I do still have it together but at other times it would be so difficult to accomplish even the most routine task and come to a satisfactory result. That took the PMS explanation out of the equations. It is then I began to realize my dual-self.
What is the Dual-self?
The dual-self is made of your Human self and your Spiritual self. Every person is made up of these two parts to their Being. These two parts are constantly present as we go through our everyday lives. They influence our actions and behavior patterns at all times. In some cases one has more influence over the other in influencing our actions and behavior. They don’t always work in since with each other but they are always present. Depending on the level of your individual alertness to what is going on between the dual selves, one is totally un aware of how each in its own way affect our character, personality, behavior and finally actions.
Defining the Human Self:
The human self is the result of our experiences through socialization, education and training. It’s developed within the social context of our social environment. Its your body or your flesh the part that is your tangible self. You can touch it feel it smell it and so forth. It what other sees and related to in everyday life.
From the time you are born, through your childhood, then adulthood your are developing the human self as you internalize certain experiences that you gain through socialization – conscious or unconscious, or education and training – be it formal or informal, directed or misdirected, deliberate or subtle. It’s what you learn as the social codes of conduct in relation to other Beings in this world.
Defining the Spirit Self:
The Spirit Self is what we sometimes call the Soul. It’s the entity that lives within you and the part of your Being that goes into the next world. It’s invisible, intangible, and resides somewhere within your body. I would say it’s also that intuitive part that triggers your “sixth sense”. And if you believe in life after death, it’s that Being that is reincarnated into the next life or “world”
Let’s not confuse the Spiritual-self with the religious sense of GOD and spiritual faith and beliefs. The spiritual beliefs and faithfulness are a manifestation of our religious teachings that are determined by ones social context base on ones denomination, creed, or culture. Understanding your Spiritual-self as a Being (or Entity) that resides within our body differentiates it from a religious connotation of faithfulness. However, by fully understanding your Spiritual-self Being allows you to fully realize your religious beliefs and spiritual faithfulness if you are so inclined.
The Third-Party-self
Having defined the dual-selves there is also another self which I call the Third-party –self. The Third-party-self is made up of a combination of both the Human-self and the Spiritual-Self. The basic nature of the Third-party-self is what I would define as a “hybrid” being of the Human-self and the Spiritual-self Beings.
Many of us go through life in the Third-party-self. In most cases, it is the Third-party self that influences our actions and behavior patterns. Whether we try to do things differently, when we are not fully conscious of the Third-party-self at work, the outcomes of our actions always end up with the same Result.
Copyright @ 1/14/2005, Dr. Tendai Ndoro (DocNdoro) – Founder, SLIPPA/Brighten The Corner Foundation; CEO EDCTrainers, LLC
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